A New Slash

To paraphrase (for legal reasons) a favorite Ron Swanson saying of mine: “Never half-commit two things; whole-commit one thing.” He is giving Leslie Knope advice on what to do whilst she is debating having two full-time jobs at once. (If you still haven’t watched Parks and Rec yet, it’s 2020, so get on it. But start with season two, then three, then one, and then four onwards… trust me, it makes sense. Oh, and it’s better than The Office. Don’t @ me.) I not only enjoy the stern, blunt guidance, but also the added irony. Why irony? Because it’s a complete contradiction to Mr. Uram’s nickname for me — “slash.” 

As in, English teacher slash swim coach slash marketing teacher slash cooking teacher slash cafeteria duty savant slash… Sure it’s a testament to various interests and bits of knowledge, but it’s a lot sometimes to have many different areas of specialty, and sometimes, I just want to cut back a bit. True to the Swanson spirit. 

Yet lately, I’ve felt there’s another slash brewing. Here’s my suspicions: 

  • No one ever knows where I am in the building. I’m not hiding from (most) people. I’m just running around doing a million things.
  • There’s a skyscraper of boxes piercing the space in the back of my room, and they weren’t there at the beginning of the year.
  • I’ve been using Google more and more, and I’m pretty sure it’s impressing the NSA and CIA. The amount of information on the interwebs is amazing…
  • Shouting in the hallway is more fun when you’re the one doing it and not the one hearing it. (Ms. Shaw is definitely happy I’m no longer next door.)
  • More decisions are being influenced by whether or not they “can be posted on ‘the Twitter.’”

Yep. Much to the half-sarcastic comments, a number of teachers have made (and I might I add, over the past year… which I’m not sure how I feel about), I’ve finally admitted to myself the new addition to the slash collection — the new Berty

And that’s not a bad thing. Mrs. Berty’s contributions and style have been holding our school together for forty-six plus years. Her commitment to making THS a place of fun learning is something all of us teachers should aspire to do each day. Her dedication to the tradition of quality stemming from our classrooms is exceptional and inspiring. It truly would be rewarding to just be part of the legend that Mrs. Berty is for anyone. 

So, I’ll take this slash and add it. But I draw the line at calling people “my little angels.” (Obviously.)